Mowing the Lawn, Part I

It really is a strange thing to enjoy mowing the lawn - it's such a process! You begin by getting out of your chair, putting on underpants, maybe some shorts or other outer-garment (so as to not offend passersby), shoes (so you don't cut your baby-soft feet on sharp blades of grass) and a T-Shirt or "wife-beater." You may go topless if desired, but consider two things: sunburn on your pale, defenseless skin, and neighbors seeing your pasty-white glory in its near entirety. Make your choice. Then go out to your garage or shed to get out your mowing apparatus. Unless you are like Geaf and have put your hard-earned cash into an awesome, electric lawnmower which stealthily glides through the yard, you should already have a fuel container and/or a full tank in your mower. You pull it out into the yard. You start it up. You're mowing the lawn.

I mowed my lawn on Sunday, for the second time in two weeks, after a 13-year hiatus. By hiatus, I mean period of time during which there was no reason for me to do so. (E.G. My dad making me do it, or having a lawn at all.) I realize that, since the previous week, my technique has already improved. Not only are my arms a little stronger from pushing the mower around the previous week, but my whole conception of lawn-mowing is more enlightened. I have ideas about how to approach my lawn in more geometrically efficient ways and my ability to maneuver the damned mowing apparatus has improved fundamentally. I have gained +2 Lawnmowing.

My real joy in mowing the lawn, though, is the time it affords me to be alone with myself and my thoughts. When I'm doing something constructive, I realized, my mind is at ease. I'm not worried about whether what I'm doing is a "waste of time," and I'm not thinking about all the other crap I should be doing. In this instance, I'm simply mowing the lawn, and few things are so simple these days.

It's the perfect time to hash out ideas and brainstorm, or to ponder that recent disagreement with my girlfriend which escalated into death threats*.

This particular day, I did both of those things. I came up with a solid idea for this blog, and had an epiphany about an insignificant argument I'd had with my girlfriend. This epiphany resulted in a greater understanding of the differences in the way she and I think, and gave me some good ideas for avoiding fights in the future by altering my approach to things.

When I was done with the lawn, I had a new creative outlet all lined up, I had a better-constructed perspective on my relationship, and I'd emptied only three bags of grass instead of five like I'd done the previous week. This was truly a constructive afternoon and, by then, I'd only spent 35 minutes of it. That leaves an entire rest-of-afternoon of earned slacking! I'm almost looking forward to doing it again this Sunday.*

*not really.